agirlnamedagnes:

This is what my husband and I purchased at the grocery store the other day.

We don’t have kids.

We are adults. We pay bills.
And drink water from a whale.

obesitycore:

I WANT TO KISS YOUR DUMB FACE AND MAKE YOU DUMB PANCAKES AND DUMB PILLOW FORTS AND I JUST WNAT TO BE DUMB WITH YOU LETS BE DUMB TOGETHER 

Disbar:

following back everyone until i find a tumblr bf♡

kittyquinnbostwick69:

marypoppinthatpussy:

That piñata seems alarmed to say the least

I am doNE WITH THIS WEBSITE

5-seconds-of-jess-n-lisa:

tastefullyoffensive:

Creations from French Girls, an iPhone app where people draw portraits based on selfies of others. [via]

Related: Subway Snapchat Art

i never laughed so hard

drunktrophywife:

tinychatter:

tinychatter:

what do you call a sunburnt penis

image

Kyle this is the worst

charlie-carmichael:

              Love the booty   

          Grab the booty

         Hold the booty 

      Desire the booty

    Fight for the booty

                 Bite the booty

                         Touch the booty

                                  Care for the booty                                

                                       Worship the booty

                                         Squeeze the booty

                                        Believe in the booty

                                      Embrace the booty

                                   Respect the booty

                            Protect the booty

                        Spank the booty

                           Hug the booty                

hi:

true friendship test: call your friend at midnight and ask if they want to go to mcdonalds

whorecrux-harry:

"Don’t kid yourself" would be a great slogan for birth control pills

mylifeasqueenb:

girls all go to the bathroom together because that’s where we rap battle